


Fuck The Sun

by AmericanSpirits



Category: Game Grumps
Genre: F/M, hurtling toward the sun, i sort of suck at writing, id do that for you if you want, im disappointed that its not realistic enough but i think thats mostly impossible, shes a cartoon maker, should i change the name of the main girl to make it an x-reader?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-25
Updated: 2016-03-28
Packaged: 2018-05-28 23:47:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 18,812
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6350467
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AmericanSpirits/pseuds/AmericanSpirits
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An up and coming animator gets her goddamned dream job. With a backing company lined up and an awesome team of artists, she just needs some voices!<br/>There's no fucking way for me to write this without fucking making it sound dumb. Essentially, the main girl needs voice actors and signs Danny, Arin, and Holly. (And then we never hear from Holly ever again why am I just noticing this!?) Then she falls in love with Danny-boy or whatever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The one where she finds out about the thing.

Noon. It was noon when I woke up. Did my alarm seriously just not go off? I sighed, pushing my hair out of my face. I dress quickly, pants, bra, shirt, sweater, socks and shoes. I’ve a bagel, my cellphone, backpack, and I was out the door. I was only half paying attention as I walked to work, focusing primarily on checking my phone for texts, sending one to my work mate about being late. If he was mad I couldn’t tell, for all he sent back was a simple demand that I check my email.  
I rolled my eyes as I pushed the door the the studio open, I figured the email would be there in a few minutes when my computer was booted up, and I had a cup of coffee in my hands. Roy, my best friend and work mate handed me a cup before I was even fully in the door. I laughed at his excitement as he pulled me into the small studio we rent and all but shoved me toward his desk. His laptop is sitting atop it, opened up to his email. I sat down and began to read the open message immediately.  
Roy took the coffee right back out of my hand just in time for me to start screaming. I understood the excitement now. The cartoon we had been working toward for years was finally picked up. I stood and hugged him, still screaming, though I quieted almost immediately as he breathed “We made it Heather.”  
I pulled back to look at him as a tear made its way down my face and I laughed. “Not yet Roy, we’ve still got a million and one things to do.” I made a mental note that there’s only about six months to do it, but with the amount soon to be residing in our bank account I seriously doubted us not finding a way.

The magical girl cartoon Roy and I have been working on was originally named Hurtling Toward the Sun as a joke but the network that picked us up had noted, during one of the three billion meetings we attended, that the name was actually appreciated. All of the changes they suggested were more than worth the trouble- most of them being things that we had wanted to change anyway. Of course we wouldn’t keep the same character outfits, of course we would up the frame rate, I wasn’t looking forward to rewriting the songs but I knew it had to be done, and the few other changes to the show were either very simple or completely necessary.  
It was a couple of weeks after we were signed. The work divided between us found Roy in near a month with a small team of animators somehow falling perfectly into our budget. I on the other hand had a grand total of zero expected . All that was left was the whole fucking thing. Roy and I could’ve filled a few spots if we stretched, but we had been warned repeatedly that not being serious in this endeavor would be “extremely unwise.”  
I was developing a migraine from working at this for so long so I stood, stretched, and went to take a shower. The hot water helped me forget my frustrations, and soon I was brushing my teeth. Everything had been so hectic these past few days and as I finished my nightly routine I ran through the names in my head. Cassandra, Erin, Pat, Cameron- the heroes. Sam, Alex- the villains. Of course the villains had more intense alternative monikers, but-  
Facebook chirped, effectively startling me out of my trance. I spat toothpaste into the sink, washed my face and sat myself behind my computer once more. Closing roughly half of the six point four billion Chrome tabs I had open, I found myself once more on Facebook. The notification was a message from the one and only Amy Miles, my high school sweetheart. We broke up over a decade ago, but thank my lucky stars we somehow remained friends. A second chirp brought me out of my reverie once more and I wondered why I was so spacy all of a sudden.  
Opening the message I was greeted with a Youtube link and “I think I found your Cameron!” I smiled, opening up the attachment in a new window. It was a lets-play for Shovel Knight by the “Game Grumps.” It was too long for me to want to watch seeing as how it was already ten here (making me wonder why my Texas ex was up at two a.m.) but I figured I might watch a little if only for Amy.  
Before I realized it however, I was dying with laughter. I watched a few more videos before telling Amy that I totally agree with her suggestion, though by that time she was asleep. I also noted that the other guy in the video would be a perfect fit for Alex, the flamboyant male villain. I found “Starbomb”, a self-titled album and played it as I researched them more thoroughly, finally finding contact information for them. I awkwardly sent a pair of emails to the boys asking them to come in for an audition. The date I gave them was the sixteenth of October, just a week from my sending the letter.  
I smiled as I looked over the emails. I addressed them to Arin Hanson, and Danny Sexbang, though used a strikethrough and wrote Avidan as a sort of joke to myself. Hauling myself from my desk chair I shut down my laptop. I smiled to myself as I put it in my backpack and set a few alarms. The next day was back to back meetings from ten till six, and then another round of storyboarding. I was asleep the second I hit the bed, and I slept soundly until eight when my alarms shrieked me awake. I grumbled as I put on pants that morning, I could have sworn I had only been asleep for a few minutes, not a few hours. Even still, I found myself with time to spare so for once I took my car, stopping by a bakery to get some coffee and donuts for Roy and I to eat on the way to our first meeting of the day. I could care less if he liked the coffee, that snob, but I tried to get him a donut that I knew he would like.  
I’ve been out of my home city in Texas for years now, but I still have yet to stop missing the pan de dulce from the bakery across the street from my mom’s work. They made the best conchas. When I pulled up at the old studio Roy was sitting in his car. He had planned on driving for the day, and I was glad I wasn’t late, though my breakfast excursion nearly exhausted all of our time. I handed him an apple fritter and a cup of coffee. He took a tentative sip and grimaced. “Thanks, I guess.” He smirked faux-snobbily before breaking into a laugh. I rolled my eyes and started working on my makeup. It was light and simple and I was done with more than enough time to finish my breakfast.  
Security waved us into the office complex and then we were parking and running and when Roy opened the door we awkwardly sidled up to the front desk. We were buzzed up to an office, and there started another long day of fighting to stay awake while we got chastised for not having enough work finished. The first two meetings were in the same place nearly, with fancy execs telling us to work harder lest we lose the contract, and then we met the sound guy. His name was Gus and he shook his head disappointedly more than he did anything else during our thirty minute discussion.  
When Gus finally gave us a list of equipment we needed I was nearly overwhelmed with relief. It was established here that we needed a recording studio in our office, which we’d need to look into at the next appointment. The landlady smiled as she opened the door to her office for us. Over the next hour we discussed getting out of our contract, and she refuted the legality of the whole concept. By the end I was kind of freaking out, how were we supposed to find space for our whole team as well as a recording booth? I was confused and then immediately calmed when she offered us a smaller space right next door. At first I wondered how a smaller space would help, but she explained we could split our office between the two spaces. We accepted ecstatically and soon we were on our way, she showed us to the new space and left us to it. I wondered aloud how we were supposed to split up our office when Roy suggested making the new space into our personal offices, which made sense considering the setup.  
One small room, with two doors which led to two pretty much equally small rooms. I obnoxiously called dibs on the right hand room as we went back to the original studio. We had saved the moving boxes when we first moved in so we were able to make quick work of packing up our desks. Our personal office area supplies were fully packed up, and we were able to move them and the desks in before it was too late and then once more I suggested celebrating. “I thought we weren’t close enough yet.” Roy mocked how I had responded to the first couple of suggestions Roy had once upon a time sent my way. “We’re months deep dude, we’ve got this on lock.” I dragged the O’s in the last word to show off my nonchalance.  
He laughed and pulled out his phone. “Lemme text the old ball and chain, but sure we can totally go somewhere.” He smiled, but before he could start to send a message his phone rang. I left him to it while i checked around to make sure there was nothing left in the big office. A large room, leading off to a smaller room that we jokingly referred to as the kitchen, despite the fact that it was storage space. When we moved in there was a single package of peanuts sitting on the floor in there, and thereafter no matter what we planned on doing with the space it was deemed the kitchen. It was made to be a recording room, with hookups and weirdly colored spots on the wall from soundproofing materials previously hung.  
There was a window connected to it leading into a slightly bigger room, with a lot of outlets. There was nothing left of the technology that once stood there, but we had always understood anyway. In this way the setup was perfect. We planned on recreating the studio as it once likely was, and in the much larger room we were going to set up desks and computers for the rest of our staff. There was just enough room, and that left me eternally giddy.  
Roy’s wife had called in a panic, something she did more and more frequently through her pregnancy. He couldn’t come out tonight, but he promised me a raincheck. I drove home, relatively content despite the disappointment, as I blared anarcho folk punk. I practiced my ukulele that night, running over the melody and tweaking the theme until i was tired enough to fall into a dreamless sleep.  
The next day came with correspondence from the Grumps. they were both busy that day, and asked if we could reschedule. I sent a text to Roy to ask if that would be okay, and he agreed, though he didn't fail to remind me that we'd only booked the audition place for a day. I suggested changing to the office and he acquiesced. I opened my email tab once more, chewing my lip thoughtfully before hitting the compose button.

>Re: Voice acting>Re: Scheduling Conflict>Re: We're Working On Our Conflict Resolution Skills  
>  
>Mr. Sexbang, the change of date from the sixteenth to the eighteenth is fine by me, though the change must unfortunately come with a change of address. ______________. I sincerely hope you can still make it.  
>Regards, Heather Zeta.

I laughed to myself and prayed that he would find it funny too, then copied the note and sent the same to Arin, though I called him “Mr. Hansom.”  
The reply was swift from both parties, only coming half an hour apart, a resounding ‘perfect’ and a couple of puns on my name. I sighed relieved as I packed up my needed daily possessions and got into the car to start the day, albeit late, but already pretty fulfilled.  
The next few days came as relatively calm reprieve. roy and I worked tirelessly through day and night to lay out the first half season's worth of storyboards while researching the equipment online. It was all available pretty cheaply at a closeby store and Roy called them to double check that they had it all. Somehow over the phone he convinced the woman to put it all together for us and she gave him a nearby date for us to pick it up.  
The sixteenth came and went with hours of auditions. I was dead on my feet by the end of it, but we had most of our cast. We still needed the pair of villains, the main girl, and one main male side character, the sidekick if you will. The boys were taken care of so long as the Grumps agreed to work with us, and I could play the girls if need be, or we could rewrite one of the parts and Roy could play it or something, regardless we'd find a way.  
By the time the eighteenth had rolled around I had totally forgotten the Grumps’ audition.


	2. The one where she meets the guys

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She meets the Grumps!

I was having an amazing dream. One I’d had frequently in the past. I’m in Ocarina of Time, and Link is too busy hitting on me to save the world. As per usual I take on the quest, and quickly morph through several challenges faced in the game. The longer I go in real life without playing it, the less I do in the dream, but recently it hasn’t held much replay value. Just before I can turn down Princess Zelda’s advances in lieu of dating Link, I was shook awake by Roy. 

“How did you get in my house,” I question groggily, but I can’t find it in me to care as he passes me a plate of breakfast and tells me to get dressed. Of course, now it hits me, we have to drive out of town to pick up the equipment. Throughout breakfast, I get dressed. So far as I can tell there’s no meetings today so the day is greeted with a beanie over my bird’s nest curls, and a shirt far too inappropriate to wear to any business related meetings.

The drive out is nice, if long, and I’m given to the temptation of wearing makeup just for the hell of it. Once we arrive, the process of loading and paying for the equipment is perfectly fine, but the clouds that have been threatening overhead look like they’re about to give way. We cover the bed of Roy’s truck with a tarp, and thank my lucky stars that we did, because five minutes into the drive home the clouds open up as if to spite us. The torrential downpour lasts about twenty minutes into unloading equipment, just long enough to assume it’ll keep at it for a long ass time. I run in to get a pair of umbrellas belonging to Roy and I, and then we begin awkwardly carrying in equipment, holding the umbrellas over the boxes so they stay dry despite us getting totally drenched. Well, me getting totally drenched, somehow Roy had the forethought to wear a raincoat, that bastard.

About a third of the boxes are unloaded, and I’m teetering three high while Roy works on getting a few more out of the truck when the wind snaps the office door closed. I stare for a long moment at it, shocked, confused, and overall at a loss for what to do. My umbrella is slipping, so stumbling back to the truck will almost definitely ruin whatever i’m holding. Before I get a chance to start swearing loudly, someone opens the door for me. The boxes slip out of my hands and I’m once more halfway to a curse when I realize that they didn’t fall, someone slid them out of my hands. 

It takes me an embarrassingly long time to realize that my eleven o’clock is here, and helping out. Danny had opened the door, while Arin had taken the boxes from my arms. I direct him to set the boxes in the kitchen, and Roy follows with a few boxes himself before we’re standing in the main room staring awkwardly at each other. “I’m so sorry, I completely forgot y’all were coming,” I start, but Arin shoos off my apology with a wave, “Don’t worry about it, dude. Shit’s stressful.” 

His ease calms me, and I chuckle “Had I fuckin’ remembered you were coming, I would have put on a more appropriate shirt.” I laughed, pulling at the- now soaking wet- pale yellow sweater reading in large letters-

“FUCK THE SUN never trust anything that’s already on fire”

-swirling round a cartoon sun. Everybody laughs a little, and then Roy chimes in that the guys can feel free to hang out for a bit while we unpack the last of it. This time Danny waves away the notion, “No reason not to help man.” So with little protest from us, we set back to work. I was halfway to worrying about the rain when I realized that in the short span of time we’d stopped to talk. 

“Are you fucking kidding me?” I breathed frustratedly toward the sky. Roy patted me on the back as he passed and I jovially yelled to him “Ten minutes! We could have waited TEN FUCKING MINUTES! I’m fucking soaked.” To which Danny replied with a wink, “Well that’s because I’m here” And despite that it took me a minute to understand the innuendo, I shook my head and muttered “what have I gotten myself into.” As I grabbed another armload of boxes. 

Many hands make light work, and just the same we were done in a fraction of the time it would have taken us with no help. Leading the group to our office area I began to apologise again, but, and I’m sensing a pattern here, I was stopped. Danny sat a hand on my shoulder and said “Dude, chill. We work like a block thataway,” he stabbed a thumb in I guess the direction and concludes “Shit, if you need to unpack some more we can come back later.” 

“We can’t unpack until we know what that shit is, dude.” Roy says as I unlock the building. “Yeah,” I add, “The sound guy is gonna maul me for not understanding that shit,” I paused, rethinking my strange choice of wording before I added “The sound guy is a bear.” The laughter in the room after that was unreal. Startled burst of laughter clawing their way out of the throats of our guests. Roy however expected it, I always told him I just needed a new audience for my humor.

I rolled my eyes and jabbed my thumb in the direction of my right hand office. Danny and Arin nodded and went toward it as I peeled my sweater off. Roy was in a similar state of discarding his top layer, but as mine was a sweater the shirt under it was damp just the same. I shrugged at myself and slogged into the office after the group. I sat behind my desk, the air conditioner making me shiver, and started to talk business.

First I showed them my characters, asked them how they’d sound, and then I told them that someone had sent me a link and I had gone mad over their normal talking voices. But, y’know, I appreciate the imput. Arin huffed a laugh and shook his head as his friend chortled. I told them I couldn’t pay them a lot at this point, but when I gave them an estimate I was told it suited them more than perfectly. We talked for a little longer before Danny casually announced that he needed to piss. Roy smirked at his nonchalance before Arin asked about the animating. 

I directed the questions to my partner and they walked off so he could get the full animators suite tour. I had a bigger fish to fry. Grabbing my silly glasses, I pulled out my ukulele again, I still hadn’t gotten the theme down. For some reason I had no problem with the music in the episodes. I had almost a year’s worth of those. I had been writing music since I was small and usually it was no problem, but the theme perplexed me. I laid my notes out on the desk and strummed along while singing.

 

“We’re hurtling towards the sun at a million miles a minute/

The earth is gonna blow along with everyone on and in it”

 

The tempo picked up and I grew a bit louder as I sang

  
“But what’s that on the horizon, a figure of a girl/”

 

Then, however the words slipped, struggling to stay on beat,

 

“Now I just need something to rhyme with puuuure”

 

And as if to compete the weird chain of him catching me off guard in a helpful way, Danny stepped into the room and jumped into the song “Hurl, pearl, azure-el,” he made an ugly face, but continued, “unfurl… curl!” He concluded pulling one of my lavender curls and as it sprang back into attention we cracked up laughing. Then I paused. “Wait, that’s totally it!” 

“Curl?” He asked faking confusion, and I disregarded him scribbling and then playing again.

  
  


“We’re hurtling towards the sun at a million miles a minute/

The earth is gonna blow along with everyone on and in it/

But what’s that on the horizon, the figure of a girl/

Her plan to save us all is starting to unfurl!

Then I continued

 

“She just got out of class/

She’s gonna save our ass/

With her team of magical bros/

She’s gonna fight/

She’ll do it right/

She’ll punch evil in the nose.

 

Laughing at the forced rhyme I bring around the chorus

 

“Thank god she’s not an anarchist/

Cause that would really suck

Instead she’s a magic superhero/

Who totally gives a- heck”

 

And I ended on a discordant note. Danny laughed “Are you sure you’ll get away with that?” He questions. I was just about to say something when Roy stepped in with Arin in tow, they were laughing loudly about something. “This has been fun you guys, I can’t wait to start recording.” Arin said to the room at large, to which his companion immediately responded by yelling something to the point of “Arin don’t forget you promised we’d get sushi after this!” 

At the mention of food my stomach growled. I played up the shifty nervous eyes as everyone looked toward me. “Heather, I still owe you that raincheck from the other day right, wanna cash in the celebratory dinner tonight?” Roy said, bleeding sincerity. Arin interjected that we should do dinner together, but Roy shrugged and I filled in his blanks, “His wife is, like, super pregnant and he promised not to do anything she can’t. I’m fully expecting them to show up at my door with an hours old infant for aunty Heather to babysit while they go and get plastered for the first time in almost a year.” 

Obviously it was a joke, and Roy responded in kind, shaking his fist and me and muttering “I told you not to tell anyone our plans.” 

Arin responded sincerely in spite of all this,”Bring your wife, dude. I’ll bring mine, we won’t get sushi, it’ll be fun.”And before I could even fully register the change in plans both Arin and Roy were on the phone with wives and Danny and I were left shrugging at each other in their wake. All was perfectly well, the wives were to be picked up by their prospective husbands, I was going to go home and change clothes, and then we were all going to meet back at the office before deciding on a resturaunt.

The guys parted directions, and as I was about to begin my walk home, Danny stopped me. “Are you walking?” He questioned, concern lacing his voice. “Yeah, man, I do it all the time.” I replied honestly. He looked at the sky, it wasn’t quite dark but it was damn near, and then he looked at me again. How far is it was the next question he asked and I told him nearly a mile. He offered to give me a ride, his car was at their office which really was apparently about a block away. Not being one to turn down a ride, I agreed, and we made the short trip to his car. 

My damp sweater laid out in my lap, I sat awkwardly as he said a few things to one of his work mates. Apparently everything was dandy because he came back quickly, and again we were off. The directions were super simple, and we were at my house in minutes, and then it was Danny’s turn to sit awkwardly, albeit in my living room. I changed quickly, though soon I ran into a problem. I owned two pair of shoes, and one was still uncomfortably full of water. The problem was that the other was sexy stiletto heels I wore to prom senior year, and while black heels never really go out of style, they also don’t really fit well with denim shorts and an oversized sweater, as was my immediate choice.

I plopped huffily on the couch next to Dan, and he of course asked what was wrong. Waving my hands as if to conjure the words, it took me a minute to phrase the problem. “I’m gonna look really dumb if I wear this outfit and crazy heels,” I ticked the statements off on my fingers as I spoke, “My normal shoes are still way too wet to wear, and if I dress with the shoes in mind I’ll be overdressed for this dinner.” 

The man on my couch hummed thoughtfully before he spoke “I’ve got it,” he said a touch cockilly, “Dress with the shoes, I’ve got a blazer in my car. If we’re both kinda too fancy then we’ll both be kinda weird.” I laughed, and then I laughed harder after taking in the deteriorating dark wash jeans, paired with a worn thin Rush T-shirt circa 1980 at most. Despite this, I agreed and as I stepped away to change once more he as well stepped away, out the door to, I assumed, get his coat.

A red skirt flittered to my ankles, one side slit to the thigh showing black footed leggings. It ran to a bit below my bust, a dark crop top nearly reaching it, and to top it all off my long black cardigan. A faded leather panama hat adorned my head, and I realized I still wore my glasses, thin round frames, pale orange to accommodate my stupid eye problems, but I figured they looked okay with the outfit. I was struggling with a choker when I reentered the living room.

Looking toward the tall mirror in the room, I finally won over my jewelry. I smoothed my skirt, and nodded to myself before turning to look at Danny. It seemed like he’d been trying to make heads or tails of his hair when I walked in, but if he were, he gave up now. Looking me over he almost looked a little taken aback. “So,” I chuckled, nervous at how nervous he looked “Is this outfit hot,” I clicked my tongue loudly “Or nah?” 

“Hot,” Danny answers a little too quickly, and I chuckled as a he blushed slightly. Running a hand through his hair he added. “Arin said we should just meet them at the place, he texted me the directions.” I nodded, and we walked in an awkward silence back to his car. Danny pulled out of the lot and as he drove I noticed the radio, quiet oldies played calmly. It must have been a cd, but I reached over to turn it off rather presumptuously a song queued up on my phone. The music was quiet for a long moment, but soon Streetlight Manifesto’s horn section flung music in Danny’s general direction. Raising my voice to be heard I stated “Look at me being rude. Real talk though, work for me or don’t, I don’t give a shit, this song was stuck in my fucking head.” 

His laughter erupted like the storm that morning. “Nah, It’s okay,” he coughed around a giggle, “I know the feeling. And this music is,” he hesitated, “actually interesting.” I could hear the sincerity in his voice, but it still drew a laugh from me. “Oh, I’m sure. From what I hear you lean less toward ska punk and more toward eighties rock ballads.” He simply shrugged as we were pulling up to the restaurant. We stepped out and by some incredible serendipity Erin pulled up not moments later. Roy and Abby were waiting for us by the door, and as we waited as a group to be lead to a table, the three of us were introduced to Erin’s wife. She was almost startlingly pretty in real life, and suddenly it clicked. “Oh my gosh, you’re -” I screwed my face up in thought, I knew it. Amy talked about her youtube channel all the time. “Maurine? No, it’s manlier than that.” I faded out and she laughed and answered “Mortemer, actually. It’s nice to meet you, have you seen my show?” She asked cautiously.

It was my turn to laugh, and then to explain that actually my Texas bestie was a fan. The conversation is put on pause as we’re finally led to a table, and we all supply our drink orders. I am staring down a pasta dish on the menu, trying to do the mental math to figure if I’ve enough for it. Then I remember that my wallet is in my backpack and my backpack is in Roy’s truck. I asked Danny if he would order the pasta dish for me before excusing myself to go retrieve my bag. 

On the way back inside some asshole in the parking lot tried to hit on me grossly, and then insulted me. I must have still looked disgusted by the time I reached our table because Abby, surrounded by near cackling stopped short and asked me was was wrong. I intentionally worsened my expression, knowing the gross sound it would give my voice. “Asshole McFuckboy in the parking lot decided it was totally charming to insult me when I didn’t seem ecstatic over his nasty ass,” I was aiming for humor, and despite hitting the mark for the most part, I couldn’t help but notice the sympathetic glint in the eyes of the girls.

We joke back and forth for a bit before I  say, “You guys don’t know any ladies that want to voice act, do you? Because I don’t think I can get away with playing the main hero and the main villain, and besides I’d rather not play either.” It was said with the undercurrent of a joke, but Suzy was suddenly interested in seeing the characters and I just so happened to have the finished versions in my bag. She looked through them, and I pointed out the pair being played by her husband and his best friend, and then I pointed out the pair as of yet not voiced by anyone.

Suzy laughed and held the hero’s picture in the faces of the men familiar to her and demanded that they tell her it didn’t look like Holly, I mean come on! Look at it. 

“Who’s holly?” I asked, and I was given a brief summary of who she was, being that she was in fact the wife of one of the other people on their youtube and an overall awesome broad. Erin suggested having Holly voice her, and I said I wouldn’t object to giving her a try. Suzy tapped at her phone for a long moment before asking if the next day would be okay, to which I said it would be perfect. Then in what was hardly a half joke I said “Suzy, you could totally play a kickass villain alongside Danny boy if you want.” And she laughed, and said she’d have to look into it.

There were only a pair of weeks left for us to record the full first season’s audio, and Suzy said she’d get back to me in a couple of days and then we exchanged numbers. Then Abby surprised everyone when she stated loudly “I will brith right this fucking second just to change to topic so help me. It’s all I ever hear about anymore.” Everyone was cracking up in seconds and before we knew it the food was on the table, and I definitely made the right choice. It was such a fun night and perfect for a celebration. Suzy or no, if Holly was apt for the role I had my full vocal cast. Nothing could bring me down to earth.

I floated through dinner, and afterward I floated to Danny’s car, as he had offered me a ride home once more. When he pulled up I couldn’t contain my giddiness and I pulled him into a hug before floating into my home. I was showered and in pajamas before I noticed the change and I was asleep not long thereafter. The next day mid afternoon, I got a text from an unknown number. It said “Hey, this is Danny, I’ve stolen your number from Suzy. Hire me or not, I don’t give a shit at this point, I need that song title, it’s stuck in my fucking head.” I laughed forever, texting back a quick “Somewhere in the Between by Streetlight Manifesto, and by the by I don’t completely mind the phone number thieving.” 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feel free to disregard the lyrics they came up with, they aren't even used by the studio in the story. 
> 
> jfc im sorry


	3. The one where her thing gets did.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The De-Butt party happens!

At the studio later I was still texting Danny when there was a knock at the door. I was rolling my eyes at a stupid message when I opened up to a shock of pink. “Hi, I’m Holly Conrad, I’m here for an audition?” She smiled nervously and I laughed, startled. Calling over my shoulder to alert Roy to her presence, I ushered her inside. “Dude, this is a little presumptuous in regards to you not being apt to our terms or whatever, but like,” I paused, failing at not wringing my hands nervously, and tried to collect myself and withhold the probably off-putting wordy-ness that creeps up on me when I’m anxious.

“Listen, I already love your voice for the villain character we need. I know Suzy said you look like the main hero girl, and you super totes do,” Did I seriously say ‘super totes’? “But your voice is what we were looking for in the spook mum lady.” I paused contemplatively before adding jovially, “I think I need more coffee before I totally scare you off.” The comment had the desired effect and Holly giggles as we step into Roy’s office. 

With what little forewarning he had, Roy pulled out the most recent character designs for the girls we still needed along with partial scripts for said characters. “Holly Conrad, meet Roy McGee, and vice versa. Roy I think she sounds perfect for Sam, gimme input.” I fluttered about, handing her a script, then shifting awkwardly as she began the process. Roy agreed, Holly agreed with the payment, we were a goddamned pit of agreement. 

Holly left not long after she came, and not much longer still, I checked my email and confirmed my worst fears. Suzy couldn’t fit working for us into her schedule. Roy and I discussed the matter and rationalized that the only answer here was for me to fill in. We needed to start recording in the next three weeks for anything to be done by the official deadline of March first. Looking at the calendar, I contemplate the time we have left. I’m still spacing out over it as I’m sending emails to the cast about recording- as well as a party we’ve planned so the cast won’t be awkward meeting each other for the first time during recording- when Roy lets himself into my office.

He laid his head on my shoulder as the rest of him occupied the chair next to me. “I’m back,” he said, apparently not realizing that I hadn’t noticed him leave. Looking down I struggle to comprehend the time; I’ve been spacing out and sending emails for hours. “The scripts and actors are finalized, the company is fine with you playing Cas.” He sounded tired and i pitied him. I patted his head and he hummed, content. “Do you wanna go home? You sound dead.” He chuckled, then sighed, and then he stood. He said a warm goodnight before he left the office and after finishing up, I follow suit.

 

A week later I contemplated what to wear to the party. It was a pretty obvious decision in the end: anything what wasn’t a sweater and jeans. Finally I settled on a dress, the upper portion a sort of vaguely lacy pattern.The bottom was a cute magenta color which matched the attached collar. Once more I wore The Heels. The air was starting to pick up a wintery chill, so a dark peacoat finished my outfit. Somehow I coaxed my intensely curly hair into something resembling sanity, and I went at the makeup a little bit extra. When I moved to California the first thing I did was dye my hair a color similar to lavender. I liked the way it made my eyes pop, and the job I had didn’t give a fuck.

I didn’t plan on walking to the studio, seeing as how I like having feet and all. Settling into

my car, I checked through a few lists I kept. Everything was ready, and I was ready, so I made my way to the studio. I might as well call it home with how frequently I stayed there, even overnight, but this night was different. It was a party!

Of course I was there a few hours early, but I didn’t mind- especially when Danny “accidentally” got the times mixed up and was only there half an hour after me. I put him to work helping set up, and when the other guests showed everything had been triple checked at least. 

There are four heroes, two male and two female, and the first  guest to arrive beyond Danny was the other heroine. Despite the stern as fuck character she was about to play, she was actually totally sweet. After her came Arin and Suzy, followed very closely by the other male hero. Holly arrived last, though not terribly late, she was rather apologetic. Her husband, whom I was excited to meet, had somehow kept her, I was told. 

Danny muttered “goddamn it Ross,” while I introduced myself. Ross was a nice enough guy, he cracked a few stupid jokes throughout the night, an accent pulling at the edge of his words. Everyone got on really well, and near midnight Danny, Roy, and I were the last people standing. We were cleaning up, and putting away, and when Roy left and Danny still didn’t make a move toward the door I realized exactly how little I minded.

We finally finished all the cleaning up, and we sat in my office quietly. I had added a couch since the last time Danny saw the room, but he didn’t comment on it. I pulled up Youtube and began recklessly blaring Smash Mouth. Why was the first word out of my tall companion’s mouth as I flailed my arms about in an embarrassing dance. “I had a hankering for some Smash Mouth.” I yelled over the music, staring him down with an ugly face. He muttered something, shaking his head. I couldn’t hear him, except when the music ended and he hadn’t, so all I could catch was “So fuckin cute.”

Finally, at stupid o’clock we parted ways. Almost every day for the next six weeks was booked with recording. Roy gave me the go ahead to take time off on the days I didn’t record. I was in almost every episode of the first season, so there wasn’t a lot of free time for me, and as soon as we were finished with recording I launched directly into drawing key frames. On the days that Danny had to record, he would hang out with me as long as he could. We’d sit quietly, I’d be drawing or working on emails or something, and he would work on band stuff, or whatever projects he had lined up. I asked him for input every once in a while, and he did the same, and by the time we were done recording it was a habit. 

On the last day he was scheduled to come in, he was acting a little differently. There was something distinctly nervous in his actions. It wasn’t anything crazy obvious, but I worried anyway. When we retired to my office at the end of the day, I finally brought it up. “Dude what’s up with you, are you okay?” I asked, and for the life of me i swear i saw him start. “Nothing’s up, I was just..” He trailed off and I made a hand motion signaling him to continue.

“Do you maybe want to go out some time?” He asked, and when I didn’t respond immediately his words picked up pace, “I mean, we’re done recording and you’re gonna be animating and stuff and I just,” he slowed, nervous again, “I want to keep seeing you, or whatever.” He scrubbed a hand through his hair and looked away. His speech endeared him to me and when he looked back I was smiling. He smiled in spite of himself and I said ”Yeah, that sounds great actually.” 

Danny left eventually, but I stayed the first of many nights. Without realizing I’d fallen asleep, I was woken up by a text. 

>Arin: So we’re all done with recording right? When is the final supposed to air?

>Me: The first of March. But hey, can I throw out a non sequitur real quick?

>Arin: Go for it dude.

>Me: On a scale from endearing to isolating, or one to ten, how deep can I reasonably go in regards to references to anarcho folk punk?

>Arin: Ten. Just fuck that shit up yo.

I rolled my eyes at his silliness. I didn’t expect a particularly serious answer, and if I did get one I likely would have disregarded it anyway. We texted back and for a little more, but nothing of great interest. 

Later in that week, I ran into a conundrum. I was writing up paychecks for my cast, and I had no clue what to write on Danny’s. It would be no problem to call him or something, we’d somehow gotten on almost startlingly close terms. The only problem with calling him was that it was like four in the morning. I’d been up for almost sixty hours non-stop and by this time everything was blurring together. I couldn’t remember if he said they were recording, or not, but after thinking on the problem for a while I decided to just text him the question.

>Me: Hey wehn im making out your check what name do i write.  ? .

 

For some reason he responded really quickly.

 

>Danny: Legally my first name is Leigh. Are we still on for tomorrow?

>Me: Thats a really cute name dude. For sure were stillon for tomorrw!

>Danny: You should probably get some sleep or something soon dude.

>Me: ur not my rel mom. 

>Me: Jk

>Me: u r my rel mom

>Me: on second thoght youre probably right

>Danny: Can I share some of this on the Grumps? It’s really funny.

>Me: yep please i want the internets looove

>Me: hype my shooow

>Me: no wait that sounds dutchy

>Me: douchy?

 

After that I stopped checking my messages and wrote a post it note to ask about it later. I just had a little bit more work and then I would definitely sleep. Danny and I were going out, I needed to be well rested for that.

A little work turned into a little more work and that turned into being confused when Roy was suddenly at the office, and then I was passed out. What I didn’t see while asleep was that about half an hour after I passed out Danny showed up. He chatted jovially with Roy for a while, but then Roy left. I had only been asleep for an hour before there was a knock at my door, which somehow startled me awake and I immediately began the “I wasn’t sleeping” charade.

I called out to grant him access, and he came in, but he stopped short a few feet past the threshold. I worked harder than I should have needed to to stifle a yawn, and despite the fact that I hoped against it, I think he noticed. “Dude, in all subtlety, did you get hit by a bus or something?” He joked, but there was a distinct worry to it. I laughed a little too hard and made overly erratic hand movements to assuage his nerves. 

“So where were you planning on taking me?” I asked as though I wasn’t running on an hour of sleep over a decade. He shook his head, “No. No, no, no. No no no. We’re not leaving. I’m pretty sure it would be actually illegal for me to take you into public like this. You need to nap.”

“Danny, we made plans. We can’t just blow ‘em off because I haven’t slept in two days.” I stood then, and started pushing my things around as if to pack up for the night, but I knew. I knew I wasn’t going to move anything. I had everything set up like I liked. I stepped away from that task and pulled on my coat. Fuller consciousness brought with it a harsh chill I’d been too zombie’d out to notice before. Willing my teeth not to chatter I continued pulling my things together. I guess Danny realized how futile arguing with me would be, because he allowed me to lead him outside.

Some would be frustrated by the weird cold front hitting California, I mean it’s California! It doesn’t get cold! I on the other hand grew up in Texas, I knew a few things about stupid weather. In Texas there was a legit saying: “If you don’t like the weather, wait ten minutes!” Danny stopping the car pulled me from my weird weather trance. Either I spaced out really fucking hard, or we hadn’t driven very far, but it was really a tossup by this point which was more likely. Regardless we were at an office building, but I was too tired to crack a joke about it.

Checking the time before we got out of the car, I realized it was just past three in the morning. When Danny asked me to hang out with him we regarded our schedules closely, but neither of us had much free time during the day for a few months. We settled on a compromise: Danny would pick me up from my work just after the Grumps finished up for the night. It left us with few options, and the office Danny led us up to looked nothing like Denny’s.

“Where are we Leigh?” I tried to sound as serious and maternal as I could, but giddiness subtracted from my overall demeanor. He laughed in spite of my downfalls and put on a Vanna White voice “Welcome to the Game Grumps office,” He dropped it quickly, adding, “I just need to grab a few things.” Before gesturing at a couple of massive bean bag chairs and telling me to “Make myself comfortable.” 

I could see what his game was, and I was not going to fall for it. There was no way he was going to trick me into sleeping when I was supposed to be hanging out with him. I sank into the seat in spite of myself, and as I fought the losing battle of keeping my eyes open, I felt him drop a heavy blanket over me. “Just fifteen minutes.” I demanded sleepily, but before he could answer I was out like a light.

After I fell asleep, Danny finished up a little work, played around on the internet, and eventually gave in and took a nap of his own. He woke up at around five thirty, but he procrastinated waking me up. The first thing I noticed when he did finally wake me up was exactly that: that he was waking me up. He sat down next to me and rubbed at my cheek with his knuckles. He was so gentle about it, his brown eyes meeting mine as he smiled so sweetly. 

The next thing I noticed was really more of an incredulous realization. He had somehow managed to have Chinese food delivered in the intimate hours of morning. It was not unwelcomed by any means. During one of the times he’d hung around after recording I gave him my cell phone and asked him to order lunch. It was really sweet of him to remember my order, and as I broke apart my chopsticks I regarded him. 

He was tall and a bit lanky, but surprisingly not that awkward. Much to the contrary, he exuded charm so much, it was like he sweat charisma. His hair was silly at times, but it really did seem to suit him, and in my tiredness I wondered for a moment where he might be without the crazy locks. I’d seen a couple pictures of younger Danny with such short hair, and I always wondered if maybe he wouldn’t be the weird letsplay heartthrob he turned out to be. When I realized where my train of thought was I shook my head to dislodge it. 

If Danny noticed, he didn’t mention it, instead choosing to ask if breakfast was okay. I chuckled around a piece of orange chicken, swallowing before saying “Dude, real talk, I would commit AT LEAST four individual murders to be woken up like this every morning.” In retrospect I probably shouldn’t have tried to make him laugh while he took a sip of his drink. He looked like he was struggling with it, so I gave him a sheepish smile and patted his hand in lieu of being able to pat his back.

He waved me off, catching his breath before he said, “Marry me and this could all be yours.” He gestured to himself and then it was my turn to struggle around a sip of water, but I think I played it off cool… if soaking yourself with water in front of a cute boy is cool.

“Heather Sexbang.” I said, trying to sound wistful. Danny snorted, though he quickly regained composure to add “Welcome the the Sexbang family.”

“I gotta admit, it’s better than the Saxbag family I was last in.” We were still laughing about this when the door opened. “Hey guys, what are y’all doing in here.” Arin questioned around whatever he was eating. I laughed awkwardly, which did nothing to help the situation along, but Danny saved us. “Somebody’s a workaholic who refused to agree to call off plans we made for last night.” As he spoke he cleaned up the mess we breakfast had made while I attempted to sort myself out.

“Yeah,” I added, regaining my conversational bearings, “Danny coerced me into an actual night’s sleep.” Arin laughed, “Well, I’m glad you’re okay. You did seem really stressed this past week. You should take some time off or something.”

I nodded thoughtfully, but I couldn’t imagine myself doing anything other than work. It probably should have been off putting or something, but I’d been so busy for so long by that point, and I could hardly remember what I used to do before all of the stress. I’d been animating for more than ten years, though nothing particularly big, and only a little ever saw the light of day. Sometimes I would put things up on Youtube, but between the animations and ukulele videos, I still clung to a meek following. I didn’t put anything out frequently enough to get more than that. 

Besides those things though, I had always been on Tumblr, Reddit, other websites like that, but I was grasping at straws for anything beyond that. I guess I had been really into video games, but It had been so long since I’d played one. The realization struck me with a sudden fervent need. I mentally took stock of my options as I said goodbye to the Grumps. I had sold all of my consoles and games in raising money to move, and I had neither want nor money to play computer games. 

Opening a new text to Danny I type:

 

>Me: Dude, I was thinking about it, and I do think I can take some free time. Real honestly rested free time.

 

I set back into work while I waited for a reply. It was a while, and when it came it found me adjourning a first meeting with the animation crew. I would give them my key frames and sound bytes and they would breathe life into them. After that meeting I had all of my worries eased.

 

>Danny: What were you thinking of doing?

>Me: I haven’t played a console video game in years can you help me fix that?

 

Eventually we agreed on a day, though it had to be a few weeks down the line, and between then we somehow settled into a rhythm. Danny would stop by after Grumping, just to hang out for a while, and sometimes he would only stay for a minute, but it was almost weirdly comforting to have him around. If I wasn’t in the office I’d tell him, and if he was planning on not coming in he’d tell me. 

My workload finally started to lighten, and I took as much advantage of that as I could. Sitting with Danny without a wall of work between us, or at times we actually managed to make it to Denny’s, or even just dancing around to shitty music. Every once in a while we’d find ourselves in an uncomfortably tired position. It would be nearing five in the morning and Danny would be cursing not leaving before he lost all functionality. I practically lived in my office, taking a page from the Grumps and investing in a couple of blankets for my space. The air conditioner was wont to overwork, and when we turned it off during the winter the lack of adequate insulation kept us on our frozen, frozen toes. Of course I’m hyperbolizing; It’s California for heck’s sake. I was raised in south/central Texas though, so I was overly accustomed to the heat.

We sat at Denny’s one night, and and I looked at him cackling around a bit of macaroni I realised something. I had feelings for this fucking nerd. When we calmed down from our laughing fit, I sighed contentedly and he rested his hand atop mine on the table. I looked up at him and he said “Whatcha sighin’ about buddy?” His words renewed my giggles a little, and I simply shook my head. “Just thinking.” I said, turning my hand  over to grasp his. “I’m really glad my friend sent me that link.” We had just been joking about Amy, so of course he knew what I was talking about.

He nodded in agreement, squeezing my hand. I smiled up at him, before contemplating his maccaroni. “Anyway, you gonna finish that?” He laughed and pushed it my way.

 

All of a sudden it was a week before the premiere and I was seeing promotions for my decades old pipe dream splattered all over reality. Somehow HTtS had picked up a hefty fan base even before it came out, though I have no doubt the “Lovley’s” were main player in that. It was a little overwhelming. The Grumps were planning a debut party at their space. 

I was standing in their kitchen about an hour before the party was to start. My first appearance on the Grump’s official Instagram happened then. I’d been washing a bag of spinach, though by way of washing it I just sort of filled it up with water and then realized I needed to drain it With little forethought I cut the bottom corner off of it. The video was of me dejectedly staring off screen as water poured from the bottom of the bag. Barry stood a few paces behind me vaguely dancing to a copy of my show’s theme that I’d brought for festivity purposes. Off in the background hung a banner that proudly proclaimed “HTtS De-Butt Viewing Party” 

Another thing that was overwhelming was how quickly I gained followers from just that. I had quite a few from mentions in videos, but this sudden acquisition of fans really tipped me over the edge of feeling ‘on the map’. 

This party was the first time I met all of the Grumps. The crew was almost as cool as my animating crew, Kevin was a sweetheart, and Barry. Somehow he and I hit it off immediately. Our personalities just sort of clicked, and before the party was even half over we’d exchanged numbers. At one point we were discussing the spinach. “Spinach tastes exactly like the color it is when you chew it up.” I said, all hard opinions, and he threw out a “Hey, I happen to like spinach.” To which I countered, “Of course, it’s great! It’s one of my favorite foods. I’m just saying, it’s grown in the sand, and it tastes like it!”

This exclamation threw him over the edge and he laughed hard enough to infect some people surrounding us to start laughing. When it was finally time for the show to start, I sat squished, Roy on one side gripping the life out of my hand, and Barry on the other laughing too loud. Danny sat at my feet, pointing out who played whom. The opening theme was nothing like I had jokingly written with Danny. The whole office had heard it enough by the time it came on that we all sang along, and every time my character came on set, I mouthed the words obnoxiously at Barry, and he struggled not to laugh.

The ending theme came around and everyone gave a round of applause. There were so many back pats I couldn’t possibly keep track of them all. The party was coming to a close, I was about to be on my way to my real honest to god home for once. I wrapped Suzy up in a hug, followed closely by Arin, and I thanked them for all their help. They thanked me for whatever reason and I waved them off. Suzy asked if I would be safe getting home, as Roy had to run home for another pregnant wife emergency just after the premiere. I again waved Suzy off, promising to be so totally safe. 

They moved on, and I walked toward the door some more before I was stopped by Barry. I pulled him into a hug as well, I was in a hug-y mood. “I’ll text you, yeah?” 

“Totally, but hey,” He pulled away, ”You should let me give you a ride home, it’s pretty late.” I thought for a minute, but before I could respond Danny was next to me, arm slung round my shoulder, “I’ve got her dude.” He sounded friendly enough, but the move was so unlike anything I’d seen from him before that I was immediately worried. I squeezed Barry’s shoulder, thanking him and wishing him a good night in one breath, before I led Danny out of the building. We were all the way to my house, before I said anything.

“Is Barry cool?” Danny sounded confused when he replied, “Yeah, totally. I live with him, dude, he’s one of my best friends and one of the coolest people I know.” The answer cemented my understanding. Danny was subconsciously jealous of Barry. He didn’t need to be, but before I made the choice to tell him as much I reasoned that just the same I didn’t need to concern myself with the problem. Instead I simply hummed and invited Danny in.

After that, I saw Barry surprisingly frequently. We’d be going to Denny’s, or karaoke, or something and I would invite him along. Nothing bad ever really comes of it, aside from Danny’s confusion at his internal feelings not matching up with his external. It was almost laughable at times, but I always made sure he wasn’t too uncomfortable. When he seemed to be in a darker place than usual I would plan a just us night out. It was cute, and totally friendly. I was having an easier time than even I expected in regards to dealing with my feelings for the giant.

One day, on very little sleep, I showed up at the Grumpspace. We were all going to dinner, something that happened really frequently on account of how close my work was to theirs. Pizza was on my horizons, but before we could head out everybody needed to finish up for the day. I reclined in one of the beanbags. I figured I could get in a small nap before we left, and that could tide me over ‘till I was back at home. It really wasn’t long before I was being woken up. Barry patted my cheek gently and as I stirred I looked up at him. He smiled warmly and nodded his head toward the door. As I got up to follow him I was quiet, taking mental stock of my overall feelings.

I’d already come to terms with my crush on Danny. Things were different with Barry. I liked that they were, we had somehow become really close really fast. Our relationship was platonic as fuck, and the more I turned the thought over in my mind, the more I liked it. I was somehow incredibly comforted by it. The concept of liking Barry as anything more than platonic hardly even occurred to me, it was to the same extent as falling for Arin or Ross. 

I sighed contentedly as I regarded my friends over the table at dinner. The fact that I could refer to them as friends warmed me. Abby and Roy were nestled into one corner of our table. Abby was due in about a week, not that the pair wasn’t incredibly ready by this point. Next to them sat Ross and Holly on one side, and Arin and Suzy on the other. I was flanked by Danny and Barry, and as I smiled across to Roy I chuckled. “Y’know Roy, Barry’s quickly replacing you for the title of “Best Friend.”” Everyone started to laugh, Barry squeezed my hand while Roy pantomimed tortured screaming. We were having fun, when suddenly. “Oh fuck, no!” Abby exclaimed. “It’s just a joke-” I started, but the reply died on my lips when I realized exactly what was happening.


	4. The on where she's holding out for a hero.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Uh, I dunno. She cuts her leg, and then she talks about Texas sayings a lot?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Listen, it's all written and everything, I just needed to post it. We don't have wifi at my house so it's either post it all now, or don't post forever, so here's the last couple of chapters!

A lot of things happened very quickly after that. Abby was chauffeured carefully to their car, Arin was paying for dinner, everyone had scooped up their things, I was on the phone with the hospital demanding the doctor be ready when my labouring friend arrived, and Danny was pulling me by the hand toward his car. We were met in the car by my loud music, Drunken Lullabies by Dropkick sawed its way around the car. Danny turned it down, but the pace felt accurate so it was left on. We dropped off Arin and Suzy, who wished us well regards. Trading to my car, it seemed second nature for Danny to just come with me automatically. It hardly occurred to me at all that he had. Barry offered to come with, his hand on my shoulder already working to calm my frazzled nerves, but with little thought to it, I simply assured him that I’d be fine.

And I was. I shook my way through two shitty cups of coffee and worked my way slowly through a package of peanuts. We’d left dinner early, and worry had been threatening to eat a hole through my stomach. Danny sensed my anxiety and wrapped me up in his gangly-ass arms. He rested his chin atop my head and I pressed the side of my face into his chest. Eventually we calmed a bit, and sat in the hospital chairs. We chatted idly, and I remarked that if Abby could just hold out a little longer, she could have a Friday the thirteenth baby. Danny laughed, and upon realizing that I more felt it rumble through his chest than heard it, I noticed just how much I was clinging to him.

Eventually Roy came out. With tears in his eyes, he silently handed me a cigar wrapped with a little pink ribbon. Where that came from, I had no idea, and without a doubt I would taunt him mercilessly for his dramatic reveal. Presently, however, I settled for screaching a little and almost bowling him over with a hug. Later, he pointed out a squidgy pink faced thing through the nursery window. “That’s her, Ariel Heather McGee,” He turned to me, shoving a finger toward me, “You’re the fucking godmother!” 

He sounded as bewildered as I felt, which was surprising seeing as he was likely far beyond me in that regard. I was tearing up all over again, when Danny said “Who’s the godfather?” 

“Jerry Seinfeld.” I answered, startling a laugh. Again, I felt the rumble more than I heard it, but still I disregarded myself. Eventually we had to part ways. For once I was giving Danny a ride home. It was weird getting directions from him, but we made it there eventually. The chatter on the way was sweet, if a little saccharine, but I couldn’t find it in myself to mind. The conversation wound down as the drive came to a close. 

Parked in front of his house I turn. “Dan, before you go-” I trailed off then, catching my voice just to add “Wow, I think that’s the first time I’ve ever called you Dan.” He laughed, and spoke into his fist like a faux microphone, “And how do you feel now?” He asked in a stupid voice before jutting his fist just under my chin. “Pretty good Dan, it’s a cute name.” We continued to giggle as his cheeks reddened. Mine warmed in what I could only assume was a blushy reverberation. I placed a hand on his arm as our snickering. 

“Seriously though,” I caught his eye and we seemed to lean almost imperceptibly toward each other with no real intention. I quickly leaned up to lay a kiss on his cheek. 

I only pulled away a little, continuing to hold his gaze as we both reddened. “Thanks.”

“What are you even thanking me for, dude?” His voice was low, soft like the moment could shatter if he wasn’t careful. I couldn’t help but crack a smile; he was so cute, his ruddy face lit up by streetlights as his dark eyes bore into mine. I could count his lashed from this close, were we in better light, and a part of me never wanted to leave. It was hard to answer his question, just from how distracted he made me, but eventually I got it out. “For being there with me today. I have absolutely no clue what I would have done without you.”

We sat like that for a while, talking in hushed tones, swapping secrets and stories as though we were hiding from something. To an extent I guess we were hiding from reality because it was with a great reluctance that he went inside eventually, but I held the quiet conversation in my mind. His gaze feather light, pillow soft, and so so warm. Where in reality it ended, my mind allowed it to loop constantly, that is until I saw him next. Every time we met it was like he replaced everything I held of him, perfect memories replacing other perfect memories despite the fact that nothing was ever perfect.

With Roy on paternity leave, I doubled down on work. Dan was confused at first, “I thought you finished the first season.” My problem with distraction remained as our relationship only grew touchier. I didn’t mind in the least, much to the contrary in fact. It was just the same this time as I explained that we only created half a season eleven episodes. I explained the reasoning behind it as I continued to draw. My office was moved around so I could lounge about on my couch, tablet and keyboard juggles about my lap. It wasn’t the best setup per se, but it was incredibly comfortable, especially when Dan was around and I could lean up against him, or in this case I had given in and was just sat in his lap. He faced forward and I sideways as we somehow continued our work around each other.

Cuddling like this didn’t mean much to me, I was a very touchy person by nature. A Skype invitation sang its way to my screen, and quickly answering it I waved hello to Roy. Dan waved as well as we started running through the things I couldn’t do on my own. Most of our days progress like this, and the comfort of the rhythm settles the stress of working without my partner. 

On one of my off days, I intentionally skipped out on planning any activities. I wanted a nice night in drinking by myself. I wanted to get drunk, but I wasn’t a hundred percent about doing it around other people. 

Even still, of course I was texting people.

 

>Me: Yknow what really chaps my ass?

>Dan: Chaps your ass?

>Me: Yeah, it’s a thing we say in Texa when things are upsetting.

>Me: Sorry I forgot you’re a yankee

>Dan: I’ll address that rude ass comment in a minute, what upsets you?

>Me: The new “punk” scene, I’m not that passionate about it anymore though

>Me: What southern phrases dooo you know?

>Dan: I probably know more than I think I know, but none come to mind.

>Me: What if I said that I think you’r as pretty as a brick shithouse?

>Dan: I don’t know how to react to that.

>Me: It just means you’re attractive. 

>Me: The opposite of ‘ugglier than a mud fence”

>Dan: I can understand that one to an extent.

>Dan: These are so weird, tell me more.

>Me: Okay, well I was talkin to a bowed up Arkie and i’m a bit piddly, but he was fit as a fiddle so fighitng himn was as hard as herding cats.

>Dan: Uh, I think I follow.

>Me: Though I reckon this was when I was a youngin. He was threatening to cut up my rag baby.

>Dan: Yeah, I get those for the most part.

>Me: It wasnt my first rodeo though so I knew he was aal hat and no cattle

 

As I tried to send another stupid text full of colloquialisms I slipped and hit the call button. I figured I had to see the mistake through, so I waited a few moments before he answered. “Hello?” He sounded tired, but my drunken mind apparently gave no shits about his sleep schedule. “I di’n’t mean to do that.” I was to the point of slurring and fucking shit up. Recognizing this, I poured out the last of the mixed drink I’d been working on. I really didn’t want to get too fucked up.

“Are you drunk?” Dan asked, and I wondered about my texting. Either I was doing some amazingly tidy typing, or he wasn’t paying that much attention. I laughed too loudly, and admitted that I was before adding, “And apparently it’s made me stupid enough that ah couldn’t pour piss out’f a boot with instructions printed on tha heel!” He laughed at my silly accent, or maybe at the silly statement before trying his hand at it.

“Howdy rahder, how’r yew gettin alawng?” This killed me, I was laughing so hard I was worried I was going to hurl. “See, you are a yankee,” I exclaimed accusatory. “Real southerners pronounce that shit “Haaddy”.” Dan was choking with laughter. “I don’t know that I completely buy that these are all real.” He said, trying to force faux seriousness into his voice.

“Y’know what the difference between a yankee and a damn yankee is, Daniel?” He laughed, and conceded that he likely did not. “Now- and this is something my grandmammy used to say- the difference is that a yankee will visit the south, and a damn yankee won’t leave.”

“So, like, if I moved to the south then I’d be a damn yankee?” I laughed and added, “So long as you’re under the Mason-Dixon line; y’know, Pennsylvania's floor.” As I spoke I began cleaning up, throwing away beer bottles, and when the trash was full I tied it up and pulled the bag out. I somehow fumbled it though, and apparently the breaking bottles was loud enough that Dan heard it. “Is everything okay over there?” He asked, worry coloring his voice. “Everything is dandy, dude,” I began as I meandered out of the kitchen. “I was just throwing stuff away. You sound about as nervous as a long tailed cat in a rocking chair factory though.” 

Once again we picked up the jovial conversation as I lay around on my couch. Eventually the tone turns toward serious and Dan mothers me into getting a cup of water. I stood in the kitchen, drinking and refilling my glass several times before reckoning it was about time for bed. I was about as lucky as a blind man crossing the street however. Just as I was leaving the room I tripped over the trash bag I had unceremoniously dropped and left in the middle of the floor.

As the phone clattered to the ground, I shrieked. I didn’t really understand what happened, later I would reason that the glass in the bag had cut me, but suddenly I was bleeding. I worked to control my breathing as I picked the phone up. Blood was pretty much my weakness, I was all at once trying not to vom while I fought to stay conscious. “Are you okay?” Dan was all but yelling in my ear and I held the phone away from my ear, training my eyes on the ceiling. “I- uhh, I tripped and, fuck. I don’t know what happened Dan, I’m,” I paused to dry heave. “I cut my leg somehow? I dunno, I jus-” again with the dry heaving, I was trying so hard not to throw up. When I put the phone back to my ear I hear “N my way. Just try to breath, everything’s gonna be okay.” He kept talking, but I could hardly focus on his words.

It wasn’t long before he was standing in my kitchen. The scene must have been startling: me sprawled across the ground, eyes screwed shut as I fought waves of nausea, blood and trash everywhere. Dan was a trooper though and was almost immediately pressing a towel to my leg. He was saying something about going to the emergency room and I nodded.

It was a weird drive, almost three in the morning, and I’d never seen the city like this before. Not this late and certainly not anxiously holding my leg as Dan almost constantly assured me I was going to be okay. At a certain point I wondered who he was trying to convince. We weren’t in the waiting room for long, but it felt like forever. It was not two hours later, and I had seven stitched and a headache bigger than hell and half of Texas. 

In the car on the way back to my house I smiled at him, “You were so nervous dude, you were sweating like a whore in church.” He laughed giddily at that and the worry dam broke. When we got home, he helped me clean up the mess in the kitchen. He was nice enough to take the trash bag all the way out to the dumpster, and I thanked him profusely. The next thing that happened, I would gladly blame on drunkenness, but I’m sure Dan could tell how far I’d sobered up. 

He came back inside and flopped beside me on the couch. He looked insanely tired, which didn’t surprise me. “Dan, you should just stay here for the night.” I said, leaning over to press my face to his shoulder. He chuckled down at my squished face and nodded. “I think I can do that.” I made a happy noise and stood, dragging him with me. His worried face spoke volumes and I quickly tried to clarify. “No worries, this is just a play for warmth, I’m- no listen to this one, I’m colder than a witch’s tit in a brass brassiere. I ain’t about to eat dinner before saying grace.” I paused before adding loudly “That’s a reference to living in sin!” Dan was laughing so hard as I stripped down for bed, while attempting to encourage him to feel free to do the same.

I slid under the covers minus pants and bra, and Dan joined me in boxers and a tee shirt. It’s always a little weird to see him without all of his layers, and as the thought slips out, he laughs for the millionth time. I wrap my arm around him, pulling him close. I had wanted to tell him something, but he caught my eye as he pulled me close, and everything melted away. I was asleep in record time.

 

Dan and I were dancing, I couldn’t really make heads or tails of our surroundings, moreover it seemed to keep changing. At first we were doing the macarena, hopping and wiggling and chortling away. Then the music changed and we were doing a less organized sort of dance, all shuffling feet and recklessly flailing arms. We bumped hips, and he spun me. With the spun came another change of music, something more classical, and Dan pulled me to him. Pressed together, we did some sort of waltz. I could hardly pay attention to our movements, focusing more on his eyes as they bore into my own. 

He spun me again and I giggled in spite of myself. When he pulled me in again he was smiling so big. We shuffled to the music for a little while more before he went in for a dip. Wherever we were was still incomprehensible, if not more so upside down, so I looked to him again. He was so close, and we were both tilting toward each other, intentions so clear. Just before our lips could meet I woke up.

I was very confused. I woke up, but as I opened my eyes Dan was still there, so close. We were somehow closer than we had been when we fell asleep. I couldn’t bring myself to move for the life of me. I soaked up the warmth as I took in the sight of sleeping Dan. It was by far not the first time I’d seen him sleep, but it might have been the closest I’d seen it. I could practically count his lashes, and I realized just how intensely I’d been staring when his eyes opened and it nearly startled me. 

We stayed still for a long time before he ever so gently said “Hey.”

“Hey.” I bit my lip and willed myself not to look away. I could tell I was blushing but before I could feel embarrassment Dan’s face reddened in much the same manner. For the second time I leaned toward him. It was entirely obvious what my intention was, and Dan licked his lips before following suit. Just as in my dream however, we were interrupted. A phone was screaming, and the spell was broken. We looked away, though thankfully instead of trying to say anything, Dan just shifted about trying to find his phone.

“What?” He barked, and I failed to stifle a giggle. I slid out of bed, ignoring Dan’s eyes lingering on my bare legs as he continued to grumpily speak into his phone. I slipped on a cute skirt, putting my back to the boy in my room and I took off my shirt. I quickly replaced it with a bra, before realizing I had no close options for clean shirts. Disregarding my indecency with a shrug I wandered to my closet.

It was going to be a hot day, so I slipped into a short sleeve top, tucking it into my high waisted skirt. Looking in the mirror, I nodded at myself. My shirt proclaimed in smooth white paint across black fabric “Smash Mouth is a Grey Area”

Turning back to Dan, it was my turn to appreciate his unusually bared skin. I bit my lip without noticing the habit. It didn’t, however, escape his notice. He wiggles his butt dorkily and said over his shoulder “See anything you like?” 

I rolled my eyes at the faux flirting, “I wish I could say that I do, but you sort of need to have an ass before I can appreciate it.” He gasped, grabbing his chest as though to say that I hurt his heart. “However will I go on!” He flopped back on my bed, his hand moving to dramatically adorn his forehead.

Again, I rolled my eyes “C’mon Danny No-butt, put on pants. You need to cover your shameful lack of ass before we can get breakfast.” He pantomimed a tear, but the effect was sort of ruined by the fact that he was shaking with barely contained laughter. 

We were still chuckling by the time we got to the parking lot. I slid into the passenger seat of Dan’s car and as per usual I immediately started playing music. We were singing along with We’re Going to be Friends, by the White Stripes when Dan motioned for me to turn it down. “When do you think is the soonest we can do karaoke?” He asked, smiling from ear to ear. 

 

Breakfast was awesome, we tried out a new place and it was to die for. It was also crazy close to my office and as Dan pulled into the lot I looked at my calendar. “Oh shit, y’all are supposed to record for me today, I hope nobody else forgot.” I exaggerated a sheepish face and Dan said “Maybe text the others, but that stupid phone call this morning was Arin.” He seemed to smirk a little when I blushed at the memory. 

“I hope you told him we were straight bangin’ as y’all spoke.” I was fishing for an equally embarrassed reaction from him, and in getting it I smirked right back at him. The tension was starting to pick up, so to avoid awkwardness I booped his nose and headed inside. He followed only slightly delayed. 

Not long after we got inside I made Dan go right back out with me as we hunted around for coffee shops. It was early enough that no staff was in the office, but late enough that they likely would be when we got back, so we ordered coffee enough for them. Waiting around for coffee felt like another forever. 

Moments like these were starting to pile up; the first time I drove him to his house, when we sat in near silence forever, or cuddling on my couch doing work separately, being alone together. Here just as well, we spoke quietly about little, what Dan actually told Arin, what I needed to finish, what Dan needed to finish, but overall we just stood close. We simply existed in the same moment, and though we would eventually head our separate ways, I would hold on to this looping memory. This little infinity.

 

On the way back the heat shattered my reverie. “Lord almighty, it’s hotter than a two dollar pistol in an all night shootout.” I exclaimed and Dan shook his head looking so fucking done “How the fuck do you still have more of these!?” 

“I have a startling amount about the heat actually, Texas is really hot. Like, “it’s so hot the hens are laying hard boiled eggs.” Or “hotter than hells brass hinges.”” I thought for a long moment, before adding “I guess I also have a lot for ugly people and stupid people. Texas is pretty goddamned shady.” 

“Shady? Shady how! I thought Texas was supposed to be full of pretty-boy cowboys and grannies who are always trying to make you eat more.” Of course he wasn’t totally serious, but I answered him anyway. “Dude, have you ever hears someone drawl out “bless yur hart, shuger”” the fake accent was kind of downright aggressive. “I thought that was supposed to be a sweet thing! Little tiny gannies!” He was laughing loudly as we got back to the office. We took a break from the discussion to hand out coffee before resuming once we reached my office.

“Listen, bless your heart basically means fuck you in southern. Also, my granny always told me I’d be “so pretty if you just lost some weight”” I put on a much softer accent, closer to how my grandmother actually spoke. He scoffed, “Whatever dude, you’re beautiful, no matter what you weigh.” I laughed in spite of myself. “Ah, but I have lost weight since then. I was a fatty when I was younger. Paula Deen breast fed me undiluted butter, just like all the other southern babies.” 

This comment caught him off guard and he chirped a startled giggle. After that we went back to the standard of working around each other, I had my head leaned against his shoulder when the front door opened and closed. I perked up a bit, but otherwise made no move to greet who was undoubtedly Roy coming in to work for the first time since Ariel was born. Continuing to slog through paperwork, eventually the door was opened and closed again, and then I could hear Arin’s voice, startlingly clear through the walls.

Dan and I both stood and made to greet them, but before I could open the door he put a hand on my wrist. I paused, and looked to him, but he seemed to be listening at the door. I followed suit, gently pressing my ear to the wood. Arin and Roy were chatting. The latter, it seems, noted aloud how unusual it was for me to be late. The former of course was then explaining that Dan had stayed the night at my house. “Finally!” Exclaimed Roy, and I chose that moment to enter. 

“Finally what?” I asked, innocent as I could play. Dan was behind me, and as we looked expectantly toward the pair, they had the good sense to look sheepish. “Let’s get recording.” Roy said, and the subject was dropped.

Somehow during the coffee adventure I did manage to text Holly, and after Arin and I recorded, she and Dan took a turn. Eventually however, the morning wound down. Holly and Arin went on their merry way, and Dan was hanging around. It was times like these that I liked to tease him, “Don’t you ever do any work with the Grumps” I joked.

“Actually, I do need to go there later, but you should come with.” He leaned against the wall in the “kitchen” cooly. Roy had gone to get one last script, I had a feeling which, but I put the dread out of my mind. “I’d love to, I don’t get why you hang out here all the time, your office is so much cooler.” He stood up straight before crossing the distance to stand in front of me. “Dude, real talk, it’s just because you’re here.” 

I couldn’t talk for a moment, but thankfully I didn’t have to. Roy was back, passing a script copy to each of us. We thanked him, and read through it for a minute. “Are you fucking kidding me dude?” I asked, I knew it was coming, and had Dan payed any attention to our script meetings he likely also knew it was coming. An awkward episode for us, but it was gonna look really cool. 

Some backstory, my character was the kind of leader of a group of magical girl heroes, although only half of them were girls. Dan’s character was the magical bastard son of a woman (Holly) who controlled a major electronics company from the shadows, leading it toward world domination. In the episode we were about to record, Dan’t character has a weird sexy dream about my character, and then he meets her in real life. This leads to Dan’s character eventually becoming a good guy, and Holly’s character becoming exponentially worse, as she watches her beloved son be lost to her enemies.

I put on a sultry voice, and Dan hammed it up what with the nervousness and such. One quote struck a chord in him, and his nervousness seemed less fake. For some reason watching him struggle, mussing up his hair, licking his lips, looking everywhere but at me, made me only want to push him farther. My heart was speeding up, and I knew my face was red, but I couldn’t help myself. We recorded the end of the episode and finished just in time before Dan got a text requesting his presence at the Grumpspace.

As we gathered our things, I put myself in his way as much as possible. Everything I did was pulled off innocently enough, but every move I made had him bumping into me, or getting caught up in a small space where he had nothing to do but press in close to slide past me. On the way to the office he still hadn’t calmed. The apogee of the whole situation occurred there in the parking lot. I planted my hand on his mid thigh and said something to the point of thanking him for all his hard work, specifics of the remark are unimportant because the main intention was to sneakily brush my fingertips against his inner thigh. Although I did linger there more than I normally would, I made sure not to linger long enough for things to become truly awkward.

Then, I calmly hopped out of his car and strode up to the office. Of course, leaving right there I missed out on Dan’s frustrated cursing. He followed me into the building and up the stairs, catching up where I’d stopped in front of the door. He had a funny look on his face so I caught his eye, blocking the entrance to the ‘space. “What’s that look for?” I looked at him through my lashes and he almost hid a shiver. “Are you gonna talk to me Danny?” I lowered my voice, letting him know exactly what I was getting at. It brought him to my level of flirtatious calm incredibly quickly. “Why don’t you tell me?” He asked, voice gravely as he maybe subconsciously leaned toward me. 

“Am I doing something to upset you?” I asked all innocent as I intentionally leaned closer to him. He swallowed thickly, starting to lean as well, but before he even had the chance to say anything he got another text. “Fuck!” He exclaimed, frustration evident as he didn’t even check the message. I stepped to the side so he could get inside but before he made a move to open the door he half pointed to me and said “We have got to finish this later, okay?” And I nodded a little breathless.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have you caught on yet that all I know is punk/ska music and Texan idioms? 
> 
> All I know if punk/ska music and Texan idioms..
> 
> I'm so sorry.


	5. The one where she does the thing.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> She does that thing everybody want to do. 
> 
> Both of those things, actually. ;)
> 
> This is more or less the last chapter. I don't really know where to go from here, but if anybody has any ideas, I could probably incorporate them.

As we walked into the ‘Space only a couple of heads turned. Arin appeared with a surprising suddenness and practically dragged Dan away with only a small hello in my direction. This was completely expected of course, and I meandered about the building, hanging out with the staff, most of which were friendly as a Texas smile. I bugged Barry for a while, “Sorry for stealing your housemate last night.” I faked a sheepish smile and he replied in a similarly jovial tone “You’d just better not do it again,” But before I could warn that I just might he added, “What happened anyway?”

In answer I held my leg up. “I got drunk and oops’d my way into seven stitches, but like” I shivered at the thought “Blood is just-” I made gross gagging and fainting gestures. Ross walked into the room, and faux dejectedly said “Awh, you don’t have to react like that every time I enter a room.” He took a seat near me and once the laughter died down between the three of us we started a discussion. It touched quite a few topics before settling firmly on the comparative merits of 2D versus 3D animation. 

For the most part we could all agree, but before a stupid disagreement could break out I interjected “Can we all just take a moment to contemplate the horrors of 3D hentai?” This startled a collective laugh which only grew as I described a theoretical 3D hentai. My reception of it grew verbally more intense as I took on a drifting, spaced out look.

“Stop,” croaked Barry, wiping a laugh tear. Ross giggled out that I fit in perfectly here and I broke my emotionless gaze to grin at him. Everyone around me was still break down laughing when Dan and Arin came back into the room. 

“Jeez, what did we miss?” Arin said around a smirk to Dan, who shrugged from where he stood in the kitchen. “Mostly just 3D hentai.” I deadpanned. 

“So not much.” He deadpanned right back to me. With everyone laughing around me, I continued to scroll through Tumblr on my phone. I wasn’t expecting anything to surprise me, but of course: “You fit in so well, dude. You should be on the show sometime.” I hadn’t been listening particularly well, as I had expected the conversation to go back to normal, so by the time this registered I couldn’t tell who had said it. Looking up, I realized that the group had lapsed into conversation about it, what game I should play, who should play with me, it was all hypothetical of course.

Although, despite that I’d only known Arin for so long, I knew that contemplative spark in his eyes meant business; he never was one to back down.

Later that day Dan caught back up with me. We were on the way out of the office, leaving together was so natural to us by this point. “Do you want to maybe get dinner or something?” Dan asked, fiddling with his keys as we exited the building. “I take it you haven’t somehow mystically forgotten about how much of an ass I made of myself earlier, huh?” I asked, only half actually hopeful. Dan smirked as he took his place behind the wheel. “Denny’s?” 

He was making it easy for me, “Nah, let’s mix it up a little!” I laughed. “Okay, so IHOP it is then.” He replied. I nodded, thankful for the reprieve from worry, even if only for the moment.

Dan found a parking spot in the mostly empty lot with ease. We entered with less ease between us, socially at least. Once we were safely tucked into a booth waiting on “stacks this high” of pancakes, Dan broke the silence between us.

“What are we doing?” He buried his face in his hands before bringing them up to muss his hair. “Getting breakfast at a stupid time of night?” I asked, trying to quell some of his nerves with half hearted humor. He gave me a look that almost bordered on sympathetic, like he was being sympathetic toward my sympathy? It also served to convey that ‘that’s not what I mean’. 

Of course I knew what he was truly talking about, but with all of the weirdness between us I didn’t know what to expect from this meeting. My biggest worry was that he would tell me that he didn’t appreciate my thinly veiled attempts to turn our relationship into something drastically less appropriate. Maybe he would even withdraw from the cartoon, feeling too awkward to continue much further. I’d need to kill off his character, or something like that, and I’d probably make it obvious what happened, and the company backing the show would fire me and Roy would have to go back to lawyering to support his family. Of course he would still have terrible hours and he would never see his family, and his kid was going to grow up to be a druggie or a prostitute or something because they never formed a good parent-child bond.

Danny must have been able to sense my panic, must have seen it in my eyes, because the next thing out of his mouth was gentle. “Heather, what’s wrong?” I was paralyzed with anxiety for a hot minute, but I somehow choked out “Ariel is gonna be a druggie prostitute-.” It was all I could get out before the food arrived, but suddenly I wasn’t hungry. 

Danny couldn’t have understood where that had come from, but he didn’t mention it. He simply put a hand on mine and made quiet shooshing noises, interspersed with gentle assurances. The fog around my brain cleared after not too long, and I started picking at my pancakes just for something to do. “I don’t really know what you’re talking about.” Danny admitted, but I assured him that there wasn’t anything to it. He didn’t quite look convinced, but he didn’t press the topic.

“I’m sorry for,” I trailed off a little staring into space as if I could pull a description from thin air.  I blinked heavily for a second before reiterating lamely, “I’m sorry for earlier.” He squeezed for a second the hand I somehow hadn’t realized he was still holding. I reveled in the sensation for a moment, but quickly snapped out of it as he spoke. “Can we just take a minute for one hundred percent honest real-talk?” So genuinely, he spoke, and I couldn’t imagine denying it to him so I nodded. “But you have to go first.” Tacked on at the end of my agreement so I wouldn’t have to ruin things just yet.

“Okay,” he nodded like it was just that easy, and maybe it was. “Well then, I guess I have to admit that I think you’re really awsome. Like- er I mean,” He was tripping over his words now so he took a large bit of pancakes to force a calming moment. Taking a deep breath after swallowing he said “I mean, I knew from the moment I met you that you were hot, but you’re so cool. You just,” He trailed off, screwing his face up in thought as he shuffled a hand through his hair. He was nervous, and I was nervous, was I hearing him wrong or- “I have kind of been having to physically restrain myself from kissing you for a while now, and I’m scared that I’m gonna fuck up and like, act on the impulse.” I stopped him after that. 

“Give me just a minute to process that, dude.” I said, and we finished our meal with minimal discussion. By the time we were finished, we hesitated to leave. “Is it too late to give my minute of real-talk?” Legitimately curious, though Dan had no qualms with my lateness in this aspect, only saying “So long as you’re comfortable, and dude can I just say that it’s okay if you don-” I cut him off with a shushing hand gesture. 

“Nah, listen. I actually feel basically the same way. I realized a while ago that I have,” I stopped short here, what to call it? I guess it was a crush, but that made me feel a little too overtly inept. “I have a thing for you.” I tried to make it sound serious, but I couldn’t stop the questioning lilt from tipping my words up as if to pose a question. Regardless of my obvious ineptitude, Dan’s whole face broke into a smile. “I just- your voice does things to me, man. And I swear, we’d never need to work again if we could just bottle and sell your laugh.” I was making an ugly face, I’m sure; all nerves and awkwardness, why wasn’t he stopping me? I buried my face in my hands wanting to quit rambling, but I couldn’t stop it. “Your stupid hair, and you’re so funny, and you’re such a dork, even though you like classic rock,” I made a face at him, but even this couldn’t stop my rambling as I chuckled through it, “and you’re just so sweet and did I mention your fucking voice?” 

Finally he stopped me, “I think your minute is up.” He said it with a weirdness in his voice that I couldn’t place until I looked in his eyes. He was so strangely giddy as he paid for dinner, something I was too mentally stranded to even consider stopping. As he pulled me along toward his car, I tried to comprehend what happened back there. Dan seemed happy, even though I word vomited all over him, and I told him how I felt and he? This is where I stopped fully comprehending things. How did he feel about it?

The drive to my house was almost startlingly quiet, when had he started expecting me to bring the music? When he stopped at my apartment, he parked, turned off the car, and turned toward me. “Do you want to come up?” I asked, and somehow I think he understood I didn’t mean to insinuate. “Sure.”

He followed me quietly, and when I opened the door, he made himself just as comfortable as usual. I had to wonder when he became a part of my routine as I automatically started a pot of water for tea. We still didn’t talk much, the silence taking an eerie tone, until we were sat next to each other at my kitchen table. Mugs hot and full of tea, Dan’s lips quirked into a smile. “So, can we reflect on the minute of real-talk with a minute of sorting things out?” A smile broke out across my face as I replied “I think we might need to make that a ten minute interlude.”

He chuckled and we began ticking off things we now understood. One: Dan liked me. Two: I liked Dan. Three: ??? I joked that number four was profit, smiling up and finally catching his eye. “Can I kiss you?”

I wasn’t expecting this, but I couldn’t find it in myself to say no. Instead I put a hand on his cheek, leaning up into him. His lips were soft, his stubble scratchy, but I couldn’t be bothered by it. I couldn’t be bothered by anything right then, everything felt so… Is it too cliche to say it felt perfect? That’s not to say it wasn’t kind of awkward, we were sitting too close side-by-side to find a comfortable position, and then I knocked my mug of tea over.

The spill wasn’t too bad, and the only thing that broke was the serious atmosphere. We worked together to clean the spill, and then Dan wrapped his arms around me. He didn’t need to say anything, and I didn’t feel the need either. Everything felt so right, as cliche as it sounds. He kissed the top of my head, and I chuckled. He didn’t hang around much longer, but before he left we arranged a date.

 

Dating dan, though tentative as it was, was not without its benefits. For instance, cuddling was still a complete go, and less platonic than ever. Also, he stopped acting so weird around Barry, which was incredibly comforting. I have to say though, my favorite part was the late night kisses, or the times he slept over, the sweet way he wound himself around me as we slept.

When we made it official in our personal social circles Roy bought me a cookie cake. It was a sweet gesture, save the fact that Arin somehow convinced him to have the dickbutt meme inscribed in orange icing. Regardless, we hugged it out. Dan was such a sweet guy, even my mom could see past his Sexbang persona, although telling my family was sort of hit or miss; my father almost immediately demanded to meet him.

 

It was mid summer when we finally figured everything out in regards to me joining the Grumps for an episode. Recording was somehow easier and harder than I thought. I had quite a few interviews about my cartoon, but in retrospect the two concepts are hardly even comparable. The recording session was actually fun, and while interviews can be exciting, they’re nothing like sitting down for a couple of rounds of some shitty video game. It was nice to take a break from the high stress of my day ob.

I played for most of the game, and it span about six episodes before we collectively decided to call it quites. Watching the videos weeks later was weird though. Usually interviews either completely miss me, or come out while I can still remember everything I said, but the time spanning between recording and publishing were crazy. So many things happened, though mainly that my cartoon was officially approved for a second season!

Some topics Dan, Arin, and I covered through the series of videos I was a part of:

-We talked a lot about punk music, though specifically about how Dan and I were only born a couple of years apart but while he leaned heavily toward the newer music from the eighties and nineties, I remained in the late seventies where the punk music began.

-Arin brought up our first meeting in response to me jokingly saying I wanted to be taken seriously as a serious business person who does serious business.

-I had to explain the way my cartoon gets made, seeing as we were an independent studio backed by a large company. They give us money with which we have mostly free roam but most of the money we make goes right back to them to pay them a little more than they initially give us.

-Dan spilled the beans about dating me, but with the standard humor ever present in his voice, the fandom was largely unbelieving. Truthfully, I was fine by this as the idea of being judged by the fans was terrifying to me. I know they’re called lovelies, but…

-The hardest laughing fit between the three of us was when I yelled, half mad with rage, that “The White Stripes are a gray area, and I wish you wouldn’t use that against me Helen.”

-And of course I mentioned that I was really gay when I was younger. “Not John Mulaney “hard opinions” gay, more like first person I ever got with was a chick gay.”

So yeah, it was strange to see people react to the things I said when I had already forgotten about saying them. I got a lot of hate for some things, mainly thinly veiled sexism, apt comments about my shitty video game skills, and people just hating on me for no real reason. When I mentioned that I had a Youtube channel and Arin more or less jokingly suggested people check it out, I wasn’t expecting anything. I mean, I’d been online making videos for literal years, and admittedly my popularity had shot up when the video quality did, but even still I was at less than a thousand subscribers.

All of a sudden my podunk little channel was swarmed. I jumped up in followers so hard that I damn near got whiplash. Silly songs I wrote years ago were all of a sudden favorites, covers of ska and punk songs alike somehow littered playlists all over the place. My favorite part though was suggestions. People begging to hear me sing things, songs they liked, or asking me to write things. They wanted to get to know me through my music, and it had been so long since anything like that had happened. It lit a fire under me again, and I was suddenly rushing through my work so that I could play more music. I was humming, tapping my foot, and dreaming up lyrical progressions to jam out to for everyone to see.

It was one of these moments that Dan caught me. One afternoon, he’d been over at my house, and without much warning I had slunk off to record. He looked busy enough to leave for a little, and he was for the most part, except… “Heather, you have got to check this out!” He called as he flung my bedroom door open. Stopping my strumming, I looked up at him expectantly. 

“Oh shit, you’re recording. Fuck I’m so sorry, I can come back-” But I cut him off, waving him over. “I’ll just edit it out or whatever, tell me what you wanted to say.” Instead of doing that, he held his phone out to me, excitement coloring even this small action. I smiled back at him and took it to read what he was pointing at. It was a snippet of conversation between Dan and his father.

He’d shown me lots of conversations since I’d met him. His father was truly an unintentionally funny guy and I was always down to hear about it, but this was different. It was a serious conversation between the two men, and it was regarding the state of Dan and I’s relationship. His dad was asking if we were really a thing, and when he explained that yeah, we are, his father said something about being proud or- I didn’t get a chance to finish it before the Dan himself was happily pulling me into a hug. 

This sort of sentiment never really meant anything to me, the whole shebang with family members, but Dan’s reaction spoke volumes about how he felt about it. He was such a genuine guy, and when he pulled me into a tender kiss it really hit me how much this was worth. This, his happiness, feeling a smile curving our kiss and we had to break away early because I laughed. He glanced toward the camera before saying lowly, “Edit that in, Heather.” And of course while I laughed my ass off with him I was thankful for the Reddit rundown I’d received regarding the Game Grumps’ various memes.

 

Somehow I convinced him to stay for a couple of covers, and that night as I got ready for bed I looked at him again. He was changing clothes, which honestly made me wonder when a change of his clothes had appeared at my place. Then I thought about how many things belonging to him there really were just lying around my apartment. 

“Are you slowly moving in?” I asked around a mouthful of toothbrush. He was bemused for a moment before he miraculously understood my question. “I guess I am,” He admitted, sheepishly running a hand through his hair. I assured him, “I think I can get used to it.” As I finished up and settled beside him.

**Author's Note:**

> Real talk tho yo, (if anyone is reading this at all) I'm rethinking the move of naming the main female character, if you think it would be more immersive without one (the standard x-reader format with the (y/n) blanks for names would suffice in that conceptualized version of the story), tell me and I'll fix that shit up for you. I'm on that theoretical name change like goddamned white on rice.


End file.
